thus making me awesome and them whores
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
My feet surprised me
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