grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
