Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
