I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
