Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Randomize
