Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize