just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
This can only be settled by a dance off.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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