When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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