If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
He felt like a one man threesome
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize