so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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