she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I wish they made helmets for livers.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize