if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm jealous of your bromance
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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