I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
