Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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