Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
where am i from again
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
