She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
