I don't think brook has ever known best
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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