Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
