Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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