There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
We're too hungover to prance.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
