My hand turned me down
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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