With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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