I faked an abortion last night.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
