So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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