Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize