I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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