Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
bring money and cleavage
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
