Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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