sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Two words: blizzard sex
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
