I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
