bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
