I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
