The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
