dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Randomize