Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
