D3 body, D1 cock
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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