I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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