I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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