when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Randomize
