I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
