I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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