Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
