Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
