It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
