So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
