well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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