What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize