would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
