Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
