farters have to be the big spoon...
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
