You work out of a Hotel?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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