um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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