we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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